As I read the face of my wife at the time, I had a feeling that she may know something. I kindly said, as kindly as I could to maybe sweeten up to her and make this very tense situation more comfortable, hello and walked into the bedroom.

     She asked where I was and sarcastically said it was about time I came home. I kept to my lie about getting the car going. She said that she didn’t believe me. She asked me point blank if I was with some other woman.

     At this point I realized that my best friend, who had called me while I was in Nebraska, may have spilled the beans. He was always very loose in the mouth and when his wife got on him, he broke down and poured out all kinds of information. I know this, because he always has always done it. But this time it was going to be a fight I would not give in to. It would be his word against mine…if he did tell.

     After she asked, I denied. i acted like she was crazy. She kept pushing it and I kept denying. Then she hit me with the fact that she knows something about me going to a girl’s house. Proof that my friend did rat me out.

     She asked me why. Why I went, why it had to be a female. I was at a loss for words and I needed to come up with some kind of something to tell her. So I told her the truth.

     I told her what I had been doing for the past 2 months while I went to her parents house, about being online and in chat rooms. I told her that I had made friends with a girl and I was interested in meeting her. I also told my wife at the time that this girl tried helping me with my side of the marriage.

     This made her cry. She told me to leave her alone for a while. So I went outside and called the girl back in Nebraska. I told her I made it home ok. I told her that I think I may have just ended my marriage. She laid a bunch of guilt on me.

     She said that this would have been delayed a few days if I had just stayed for the weekend. She teased me with how great sex we could have had and she told me I won’t be getting any at home.

     I started to really miss her. This was a call I never should have made. It was beginning to tear me up inside. I wanted both of these women, but I knew that was not possible. I started to think ridiculous ideas of just packing up and leaving this whole mess.

     But I did not want to leave my daughters. I also did not want to leave my job. I needed to talk to someone, but nobody knew what I had done. My best friend was useless because he would just run and tell his wife who would call mine at the time.

     So I went back inside to have it out with my crying, and angry wife at the time. I planned on laying it all out on the table of what I had done, and tell her what I wanted.

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August 2020


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