Baby-Making With An IUI

     My wife and I are on a mission to make a baby. I have written, in this blog, all about our experiences during our journey to make a baby. We have had close calls, we had our hopes fade, and we have had disappointments. But then we would try again the following month, repeating this cycle.

     I am going to sum up the journey so far, and to get myself acquainted with what I have written, and not written, to this point.

     Fifteen months ago, I had a vasectomy reversal. It was a good decision because it gave my wife and I the chance to make a baby. We had decided to try right before we got married a year earlier. We were excited and willing to “do the do” on time, every month, like clockwork.

     So I got reversed, and a month later the trying began. Every month, according to my wife’s clock and her calendar and her “piss sticks” and most of all, her say-so, we tried.  It was fun for the first couple months. Then frustration set in. Then it became work. Never had I thought that having sex would be work and I would feel pressured.

     Along the way, I had taken in 3 sperm samples to see what my army of baby-makers were up to. I found out they were there. Plenty of them. Some 20 million of them. But they were slow, almost inactive, but they were there. And that’s what mattered because we were able to keep trying.

     Several months went by and my wife and I got to the point where we weren’t watching the calendar anymore. We were doing the deed when we wanted. We tried to take the pressure off. This didn’t work either.

     We talked to a urologist and got advise on what to try to do to help. This is where he hit us with trying IUI, intrauterine insemination. This is a procedure where, after I produce sperm sample, they take it out, and put it in my wife’s uterus.

     My wife was instructed to pay attention to her ovulation times of the month. She bought a First Response pregnancy kit, where she has to urinate on one and it tells her of her hormonal levels, also known as her LH surge. When it peaks, we are to come into the clinic the following day and they will perform the IUI.

     When her levels are high, she has an egg in her uterus. When the IUI is performed, sperm is shot into the uterus. This procedure, in real easy terms, is putting the boy in the same room as the girl without having him have to walk through the front door, walk down a hallway and enter her room. This procedure skips the journey and puts the boy in the same room immediately.

     This procedure was performed a week and a half ago. We are waiting to see if this works. I hope it does. My beautiful wife hopes it does, too. I know my sperm are slow and lazy. I refer to them as a bunch of fat, lazy kids playing video games while eating licorice. I hope that with them being put in the uterus with her egg will motivate them to move their asses and hook up and get my wife pregnant.

     I hope to have news in the next week or so. Until then, I will treat my wife as if she is “with child” by not letting her do any strenuous chores, although the doctor told her to go about living life the same as usual. But until we know, we will wait.

My Story…Part 11

     I worked as a new meter reader for the gas company shortly before the girl I was seeing went away to school to Michigan Technological University. That school is way up in the Upper Peninsula. I lived in the far, southern part of the lower.

     I visited her every other weekend. Part of my decision to stay working and go to school closer to home was because we had planned a life together when her schooling was finished. It was the plan I had set in motion when I accepted the job and decided not to go back to Ferris State University.

     I drove the eight hour ride up to see her every other week, if not more. But on one of those first trips up there, another life-altering move was set in motion. I got her pregnant.

     It rocked me to my socks that this had come to be when I found out about a month later. I was gonna be a daddy to someone! ME!! I didn’t expect this at all. It was so unplanned so early on in my life. I was only 19. But something inside me said I can do this if I put my mind to it.

     The hardest obstacle to overcome was letting our parents know what was going on. She told her mom early on. I on the other hand had my hand forced during a confrontation with my dad.

     I used to spend alot of time on the phone with her in the evenings. Every night we were talking until it got to where my dad was getting outrageous phone bills and started to get on my case to talk to her less. He made a deal with me to talk less or I would have to pay my part of the bill. So of course I agreed to pay him. I had a good job. Paid well. I didn’t care. But he did.

     He thought I was throwing my money away. We got into arguments about it. He thought I should save up, I told him I was, but I kept the calls going. He even wanted to charge me some kind of interest on top of my due amount to teach me a lesson! I don’t remember his figure, but I was irate about this. Who was he to tell me how I was gonna spend my money?

     After it was established she was pregnant, we happened to be on the phone one particular night discussing what our next move would be. My dad busted into the room as I was on the phone and started hollering at me to get off the phone. I was embarassed, shocked, my nerves were already fried due to the pregnancy, and so I yelled back.

     Once i got off the phone with her, I had it out with my dad. He was asking me why I am on the phone all the time. He wanted answers. He could not understand why I was doing this every single night. I told I didn’t know. But I knew full well why now. We were making plans and throwing around ideas about the pregnancy.

     He yelled at me for not knowing. For throwing my money away. I yelled back and told him to leave me alone about it, that I had some stuff on my mind that we were working out. The he put his hands on my shoulders and asked why I did not know. Then he hit me with…”Is she pregnant?”

     I put MY hands on HIS shoulders and in a tearful response I said…”Yes! You’re gonna be a grandpa.”